Mary's Muse

Funny Four-Year-Old's Retelling of The Story of Moses

Moses

After Joseph, there was a mean pharaoh.  One day, there was a little baby in a basket and there was this princess.  The princess named the baby Moses.  When Moses growed up, then he didn’t know what to do (right Mama?).  But he was sad because his brothers got squished (right Mama?).  And God’s people were slaves.  He became a shepherd and he saw this burning bush, but the bush wasn’t on fire, it was just burning.  God spoke to him out of the bush.  He told Moses to go back to Egypt and he put down his stick and the stick turned into a snake and then he went back and picked it up and then the snake turned back into a stick.  Then he made frogs in the rhinal place.  And then there were all these bumblebees and everywhere and the king hated it.  So he told who to come?  God told who to come?  So the king told Moses to get the bumblebees out, and he did.  But the king was still not happy because he wanted the people slaved.  God made the water open so they walked through it and splashed in puddles with it.  And then it closed everywhere it wanted to.  And God’s people came back home.

Savvy Seven-Year-Old's Narration of The Story of Joseph

Joseph and His Brothers

There was a man named Jacob who had a very big family. One day, Jacob was very happy so he gave Joseph a very colored coat.  All his brothers were jealous of him.   One night, Joseph had a dream that there was 11 grain stalks that were his brothers.  Joseph stood up in his dream, the one that was Joseph.  And all the other pieces of grain bowed down to the one that was Joseph.  All his brothers were even more jealous of him.

Then Jacob said that his mother and him would have to bow down to him, too?  And then Joseph had another dream.  This time it was about the sun, the moon, and 11 stars bowing to him.  When he woke up, his brothers put him in a hole.  Then traders came and took Joseph.  And his brothers sold Joseph for 20 pieces of silver.

Even though Joseph didn’t do anything wrong, he was thrown in jail. But God still remembered him.  He saw some of the king’s workers in there, too.  Whenever they had dreams, they came to Joseph. 

One night, the king had a dream.  Then he remembered that Joseph knew how to tell what dreams meant.  Seven fat cows came out of the water.   And then seven skinny cows came out of the water and ate the fat cows.  And there were seven good ears of corn and seven bad ears.  Then the king asked what it meant.  Joseph said that there were seven good years of growing season and seven bad years of no growing season.  So they were gathering the food up for the seven bad seasons.

The king made Joseph a really important person of the kingdom.  One day, Jacob sent his children to go get some food in Egypt.  They did not know who he was and Joseph pretended to not know them.  Then he said, “Leave one brother in Egypt.  When you come back for more food, bring back your smallest brother.”  So they brang back their smallest brother.  Then he said that he was Joseph.  “I forgive you because you are my brothers.  God made this happen so that I could save Egypt.  The family moved to Egypt.

DQ's second spontaneous narration

I read On the Farm to DQ who promptly took the book from my hands and narrated it back to me.  She flipped the pages and narrated the story practically verbatim.  It helped that much of the text was repetetive and fun animal sounds abound throughout the book.

The basic premise of the story is that everywhere the poor cat travels to find peace, she is assaulted with noise, from the farmhouse kitchen, where the dogs are barking, to the farmyard, the stable, the henhouse, the fields, and the pigsty.  Finally, she finds in the barn, a quiet and cozy spot.  To find out the surprise ending, you'll have to read it yourself!

My 2-year-old Narrates!

Last night, I read Time for Naps by Jane Yolen to my 2-year-old, Drama Queen.  I was absolutely floored when she narrated practically the whole thing back to me.  She even said, "No more rumbles, no more roars ... dino-snores."  This child is eager to read.  She'll pick up a dictionary and page through it, reading me the "stories" within.

I started thinking, after that experience, about how early in life home education really begins.  The one-hour-old babe, searching for something to fill his belly is taught to suckle.  Eating solid food, communication, fine and gross motor skills, telling each other about stories we've read, listening to rich literature being read, hiking and discovering nature, all these things are learning experiences we can participate in without textbooks.

So why is the textbook industry so big?

Still Homesick

Is this crazy or what?  I'm a tried and true red-blooded American.  So why am I homesick for England?  Well, there are several reasons.  First, it was incredibly family-friendly.  Let's just do a quick scan of some of the fun things we did that I miss.

• Warwick Castle includes authentic period indoor tours, outdoor trebuchet demonstrations, archery shows, birds of prey, jousting, iceskating.  Full of history.  Tons of fun.
• Leeds Castle we had so much fun outdoors that we never made it inside!  This castle has gorgeous grounds with two mazes and gardens galore.
• Ickworth House has an outdoors almost as fun as Leeds.  We walked a long path that led to a little chapel in a sheep field.  They also had a shaded place for kids to play close to a picnic area.
• Oxford Museum of Natural History was so much fun and free to boot!
• Pitt Rivers Museum was another museum we visited in Oxford.
• Walsingham has Our Lady of Walsingham Catholic Shrine and the Slipper Chapel.

When we moved back ot the U.S., we thought that we were moving to a child-friendly, family-friendly state.  Not true.  *Family* activities for which you can buy a membership here include three people.  If you have any more than one child, you pay ... MASSIVELY.

While driving in England can tax your brain and your patience, gardening does not.  I so love that.  Basically, you buy some seeds and plant them.  The earth is rich.  Rain waters seeds steadily.  And you have a lush garden before you know it.  Yes, weeds can take over if  you're not careful.  They'll take over no matter where you live.

I would so like to be relocated to England again, even if it means letting go of half of what we own.   We missed Wales, Scotland, Ireland, and ever so many little things. We never managed to navigate through Cambridge. We never ice skated at Warwick.  We barely missed the Jane Austen Centre in Bath.  Oh, and to think that I had a chance to see Mr. Darcy's house from Pride and Prejudice and missed it!  Three years was not enough.

The Frog Prince, as narrated by Princess

The Frog Prince

There was a princess who walked down into the woods and there was a little well sitting there.  She sat down and she played with her golden ball and she dropped it in the water and the princess knew that the water was deep. So she saw a frog and the frog said, “I can get your golden ball if you give me something.  And I will give you my dresses my jewelry and even this golden crown on my head so the frog disappeared down into the well.  When the frog came up the princess saw that the frog had the ball in his mouth. So he gave the ball to the princess and the frog said, “Take me to your house and I will eat off your golden plate and I will drink out of your gold cup.” So the princess took the ball and ran away to the castle. She sat down and ate. She forgot the whole thing about the frog.  And the princess heard ploppety plip, ploppety plip. And there sat the big frog that was cold and green.  The frog said, “Let me in, now.”  The girl opened the door and saw the frog and then she shut the door and ran back in.  The king said, “What are you afraid of? Is there a big giant coming to take you away?” No it’s just this ugly frog that wants to sleep in my bed, eat off my gold plate and drink off my gold cup.”  The king reminded her that she needed to keep her promise.  The princess let the frog in because she could never break a promise so she let him in.  So she had to let him eat off her gold plate and drink from her gold cup.  And the frog said, “Scoot the plate over a little so we can eat together.” So she did.  And she let the frog drink out of her gold cup.  The frog said, “I am full, I don’t want to eat any more.  Carry me upstairs to your cozy bed.”  So she dropped the frog on the floor.  But she heard the worst noise that she didn’t like. Plippety plop, ploppety plip.  And there was the big frog. And the frog said, “No, the floor’s too hard. Lift me up on your bed.  So she did. She put him on the end of the bed.”  When the day started to come up, he said, “Put me under your pillow it will be cozier under there.”  So the frog went.  And then, he hopped off the bed and he became a prince.  “Now will you let me be your playfellow?” said the prince and she said, “Yes.” And when they were grown up they went out to the well and played with her golden ball together.  The End.

She likes onomatopoeia, doesn't she?